Bush Is Hosting A Meeting

True Love

On November 15, our lame turkey president is hosting a meeting of world leaders.  Fear not, oh libertarians, your Shrubby champion will urge his fellow despots to support “Democratic Capitalism”.   What the hell is “Democratic Capitalism”?   Is that anything like National Socialism?   Baby-Doc Bush states that it’s about free markets, free enterprise, and free trade. Note that the operative word here is free, as in Scot free; as in “you watch out for the cops while we mug the housing market”.   The U.S government doesn’t even make a pretense to honesty anymore.  America watched as our congress divided up a 750 billion dollar swag amongst the very crooks who ripped us off.   Frankly, I don’t understand why they even bother outlawing street mugging anymore.  Maybe it’s because Wall St. can’t stand the competition?

According to the Yahoo! article, the location of the meeting has not yet been announced.  People speculate that it’s to foil protesters.  I think it’s so there are no witnesses.  This is the second time in 80 years that the U.S has caused a worldwide economic meltdown.   I think that the location is a secret because the rest of the world’s leaders don’t want any witnesses.   Rumor has it that Gordon Brown’s valet caught the Prime Minister packing a cosh into his briefcase.  There are also whispers about secret meetings between Brown and Kevin Rudd at a Malaysian pub frequented by mercenaries.  There are speculations that the PM of Japan was spotted at secret meetings with the Yakuza.  Then again, this may all be baseless rumors and the world leaders are simply going to rat pack poor Dubya.

Our fearless leader’s spokesrat said that it was unlikely that they would come to an accord on the first meeting.   Well, duh! Baby-Doc Bush only has two months left before his exit plan.  Bush’s exit plan is to pack his bags and leave the mess for the next guy to deal with.  The only question is whether he heads for South America like Bohrmann, or simply exiles himself in Florida like O.J. So really, what can we expect Dubya to do except do a holding action while Wall St. CEOs stuff money in duffel bags and high tail it West Palm Beach? You can’t send out of state subpoenas into Florida.

Seriously, what possible use can come out of a meeting with Baby-Doc Bush? The man is totally Wall St. He doesn’t hear anything he doesn’t want to hear. He ignores criticism and doesn’t care what his own constituents want.  What makes the rest of the world think that he’s going to do anything positive about the situation he put the world into?   It’s not as if Bush was actually in charge. He is the front man for the same team that was in office when Nixon was president.   Nixon was too drunk most of the time to be effective.   Reagan was senile.  Bush is just simply too stupid to really understand what is going on.   So unless the leaders of the world plan on rat packing George and kicking him to death, I cannot imagine what they hope to accomplish.

The real danger of this meeting is not that Bush will take it over.   At this stage of the game, America has ceased to be a player in the world economy. The only thing we produce is oil, and that is a rapidly disappearing commodity. We do not grow our own crops any more.  The lion’s share of our production was sent overseas.   It looks like our leaders have screwed the pooch by outsourcing America to death.   The biggest danger we face is being set aside and ignored.  The rest of the world can fix their own economies and simply let the U.S stew in its own juices.

I can just imagine the libertarians are going to love that! . Oh, those rocket scientists would dance and sing and hug each other while toasting the return of small capitalism.  Then they would realize that the price of small capitalism is a short and brutish life without the amenities they think are theirs by right. There won’t be time to post on the Internet when they have to go out and grow their own damned beans.   There has never been a day when America was not a part of the world economy.   Watch what happens to our currency once we are set adrift.

I hope the next president will have the brains god gave a rock. With good luck the SEC and the FTC will be restored.  Maybe this free enterprise garbage will be reinterpreted.  Free enterprise should not mean being able to steal anything not nailed down.  Otherwise we can look forward to a very grim future.

Nancy is Their Hag

If I Play Enough Videos Games, Will I Be A Real Ninja?

It Was All Goldfinger's Fault

I’ll tell you one thing, September 11^th Conspiracy theorists are a tenacious lot.  The only group of people more determined to avoid reality is Right Wing Christianoids. The conspiracy people even use the same bullying tactics and peer pressure arguments that the Christianoids use.   “Why do you believe the government’s story?” is one such accusation they throw at me.  This is reminiscent of the Christianoids telling me that if I don’t believe in Jesus, then I must be worshiping Satan.   Its a black and white thing to these people; if you do not accept their party line then you are a government dupe.   It never occurs to them that both they and the government could be full of it.

September 11^th conspiracy folk are in denial about the stupidity of the people who run this once great nation.   I can hardly blame them for that.   It is a hard thing to acknowledge that our leaders have IQs lower than our shoe sizes.   Yet look what happened to New Orleans with Katrina.  The entire Washington cabal was in denial over the situation.  They paid no attention to it.  Then they panicked after they could no longer deny the seriousness of the disaster.  Panic seems to be the constant state of the Bush Administration.  Bin Laden could not possibly have picked a better President to attack.   When the planes hit, Bush and his comic opera cohorts panicked and attacked Afghanistan.  To this day we have no idea what Bush thought he would accomplish.  It was simply a panic reaction to give the people at home the illusion that somebody competent was in charge.

I suspect that September 11^th conspiracy people are having trouble understanding the utter depths of stupidity that humanity is capable of.  The idea that utterly incompetent people are running the country scares them to death.  A conspiracy provides them with the same comfort that Jesus supplies to Christianoids.  The idea is that somebody is in charge even if that somebody is Goldfinger.   At least Goldfinger is smart.

One of the arguments that the conspiracy people keep throwing out at me is, how did the government figure out that it was bin Laden so quickly?   Well, it’s like this.  The FBI tried to warn Bush that the attack was going to happen.  The CIA tried to warn Rice that it was going to happen.  They got escorted out of her office for their their troubles.  The Mossad tried to warn Bush that the attack was going to happen.  So did French and Swiss security.   The Swiss know about it.   So after the planes hit their targets, Bush said, “duh, it must have been bin Laden”..

The most damning evidence of Bush’s stupidity is the war in Iraq.  Hey, we all knew that there was going to be a war in Iraq.  We knew that before Bush was elected.  Bill Clinton bombed Iraq to raise himself in the polls.   After he bombed Baghdad he called himself the comeback kid.  Clinton had less provocation than Bush and he came out smelling like a rose.  Bush and his buddies are so stupid that they screwed up.  If it was a conspiracy, don’t you think that the Bush Administration would have cooked up better excuses?   Even Nancy Pelosi is having trouble covering for Bush’s incompetence

September 11^th conspiracies are also an emotional outlet for a feeling of powerlessness.  It is an expression of frustration for situations that people feel helpless about.   It’s hard to admit that you lost your home and your job was outsourced to Timbuktu because the people in charge are too stupid to pound sand.   It is also an excuse not to do anything about it.   How does one fight Goldfinger? Nobody even knows where Goldfinger is.  Since unions are vilified in our current libertarian atmosphere, how does one deal with a government that does not listen?  A couple of good national strikes would get Bush’s attention, but strikes would be communist.

Were I George W. Bush, I would be hiring PR specialists by the dozen, and have them cranking out September 11^th conspiracies by the bushel. It’s the greatest thing to ever happen to the stupidest administration since Grant.  The idea of a secret cabal calling the shots certainly takes Bush off the hook.   It absolves him of responsibility for all his actions, from stealing the election to the Iraq war. Sometimes September 11^th conspiracies remind me of the Royalists during the French Revolution who insisted that the king was being manipulated by a secret cabal of Masons.  Like the Conspiracy people of today, the Royalists would do anything to avoid admitting that their king was stupid.

September 11^th theorists will do anything to avoid admitting that we are being led to destruction by morons.  One asked why bin Laden’s people went to the United States to learn to fly when bin Laden had a perfectly good flight stimulator.   Well, if I play enough video games will I become a ninja?  You actually have to get into a plane to learn to fly it.  Simulators just don’t do it for any real flying.   Another argument is that there has to be a conspiracy because the conspirators are still rich.  That argument is straight out of the Protestant Work Ethic.   Of course rich people are smarter than we are.  God made them that way.  The fact that our current crop of political howler monkeys triggered a world wide stock market crash must be part of their cunning plan. This means that the conspirators must be Blackadder and Baldric.   Nobody else could possibly be that stupid.

Bush Is A Tough Act To Follow

Come On All You Haters; Follow the Paris Camp

The Only Candidate With Nothing Up Her Sleeve

I don’t know what’s worse: the fact that everybody I know is getting on my case about my candidate or that nobody has been leaving any comments on my blog. If I didn’t know better, I would start thinking that everybody thinks I’m just a doddering old crank. Well everybody who knows me in real life already knows that I’m just a doddering old crank, but has everyone on the world wide web already figured that out? Come on, This is only my third post on WordPress. Give me a little more time before you come to the same opinion that my real world friends have already come to. Do you have to be so quick to realize the obvious?

But really, what does me being a doddering old crank have to do with Paris’s candidacy? Paris Hilton would make a great president. I mean really, she may not be the brightest light in the disco, but we survived eight years of Reagan and he was senile. We survived having James Watts as Secretary of the Interior, could Paris do any worse by giving that Job to Snoop Dog? George W. Bush may also not be the sharpest knife in the drawer, but we already learned from Reagan that intelligence is not a prerequisite for being president. I mean, you don’t see Noam Chomsky running for president. So what if Paris wants Fabio to be the Secretary of State? He couldn’t possibly do a worse job than Rice and besides, he has a hot accent just like Kissinger.

So Paris drinks a bit. What the hell, so did Nixon. Nixon bugged the oval office and kept illegal records of his conversations. Paris would put a webcam in the presidential bedroom, and the SCOTUS has already declared that to be free and protected speech. So what’s the problem? It would certainly give Fox News something to report, and give Rush Limbaugh lots of important things to rant about. And if you are worried that she will be like Bill Clinton and be indulging in oral sex in the Oval Office, at least she won’t be asking for it in public rest rooms like Larry Craig.

A Paris presidency will be the best thing that ever happened to American politics. It will keep the masses entertained with all the sex and scandal it could want without as much as threatening corporate interests. I mean really, why pay attention to the War in Iraq, Global Warming, The Christianoid take-over of the Justice Dept. and the military, the real estate melt down, rising gas prices, and unemployment when you could be paying attention to Paris? Think of all the tax money that could be saved by Paris creating her own scandals instead of having scandals thought up by public relations agents? The White House could cut its staffing in half just from the P.R. Hacks they could fire.

Now a lot of my friends get really angry at me when I tell them this. They tell me that they are voting for Obama because they want change in government. They want change they can count on. Well, I always say that if you want to see where a candidate really stands, go and see how he votes when the public isn’t looking. So I show them this website.

http://www.votesmart.org/index.htm

Type in Barack Obama and you can see how Obama voted on all the major issues. I know how excited you Obama supporters are to be able to see just how your man is going to create change in the government. I don’t really have the heart to tell you that Obama has either abstained or failed to be present at most of the votes that matter the most. He abstained from voting on the Iraq war. He voted in favor of some minor health care reforms, but otherwise, Obama has been utterly neutral in all the major issues that affect this country. So it is a total fantasy to think that Obama represents any sort of change in this country, and if you are going to vote for a fantasy; I say vote for a fantasy you can get off on.

This November, Vote for Paris Hilton, The Only Change That Matters In Washington.